Explosive Popcorn

Just the other day, I had to ask my husband to put his hands on either side of my head to stop it from spinning. I had just finished reading a news report about the allotment of funding for homeland security.

Apparently, in its infinite wisdom, the Department of Homeland Defense deemed Indiana more of a risk for terrorist attacks than New York, because, and I quote, New York doesn’t have any “national icons.”

After I regained my equilibrium from the head-spinning, I decided to check out the list of potential terrorist targets that the Department of Homeland Security was concerned about.

Are you sitting down?

The Groundhog Zoo in Pennsylvania; the Kangaroo Conservation Center in Georgia; the Sweetwater Flea Market in Tennessee, Weeki Wachee Springs, and Dinosaur World in Florida.

Among the shopping malls, lube shops, petting zoos, and the Mule Day Parade, conspicuously missing is the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, the Empire State Building, and the Brooklyn Bridge. Oh, wait, they’re not “national icons.”

I was relieved to see the Krispy Kreme doughnut shop near Des Moines listed, as well as the Amish Country Popcorn Factory in Indiana. I could sleep better now. I had been concerned about the safety of our doughnuts and popcorn. It’s been weighing heavily on my mind for quite some time.

I really ought to send a thank you card to President Bush and his administration. There are times when I sit down to write my column and think I will never find something to write about this week. And then I pick up a newspaper.

Chocolate Caramel Popcorn
1 cup popcorn, for popping
For the caramel:
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons sugar
1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons corn syrup
Scant 1/4 cup water
1 pound bittersweet chocolate, for melting

Pop the popcorn.

To make the caramel: Place the sugar, corn syrup, and water in a large saucepan over medium-high heat and cook until light golden brown. Make sure you use a large pot, as you’re going to add the popcorn to it.

Use a wooden spoon to stir the popcorn into the caramel until it is evenly coated. Pour the caramelized popcorn onto a parchment or wax paper-lined baking sheet and allow it to cool. When cool, use your hands to break up any clumps.

Place the cool popcorn in a large bowl. Melt the chocolate in a double boiler, and drizzle it over the popcorn, stirring with a wooden spoon as you go. Keep adding chocolate until the popcorn is evenly coated. Pour the chocolate-coated popcorn onto a parchment or wax paper-lined baking sheet and allow to cool.

Note: Be careful when you work with the caramel. It is very hot and can burn you easily. Keep a bowl of ice water next to you in case you get caramel on your hands. Makes 4 cups caramel popcorn.

Thatsa Spicy Popcorn
1 cup popcorn, for popping
2 tablespoons melted butter
1/2 teaspoon paprika
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon cumin
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper

Pop the popcorn. Drizzle with melted butter and mix with a wooden spoon to distribute evenly. Combine the spices in a small dish and sprinkle the blend over the hot corn. Mix again with the wooden spoon. Makes enough for 8.